When Will It Stop Hurting? by Glenn Cameron – Exclusive Excerpt and Giveaway

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Crystle was the love of his life. For thirty-six years they had done everything together. As retirement approached all he could think of was spending even more time with his beautiful wife, growing old together. Just three years earlier they had sold their home in the Toronto area and moved to Niagara in preparation for retirement. Then on her 58th birthday, Crystle was diagnosed with stage four brain cancer. A terminal diagnosis that Glenn never allowed himself to accept. But just eight months later she had succumbed to her illness and Glenn was thrust into a time filled with uncontrolled grief that seemed to almost suffocate him. This is his real life story. He shares the raw emotions and the dark places he visited in his mind. His story will make you laugh and cry. It will makes you cherish your loved ones. You will be uplifted as you follow his path in overcoming grief. His inspirational story will provide comfort and hope to others struggling with grief.

Enjoy an Excerpt

So how did grief change for me when Crystle passed away?

For the first week after she passed, our home was busy. It was filled with family as we prepared a celebration of life for Crystle. It was a good distraction, if I can use that expression. But at the same time, I was succumbing to a myriad of negative emotions.

I was becoming very angry. Why me? Or more importantly, why Crystle? Surely there was no more loving or gentler woman on this earth than Crystle. I was becoming angry with a God that I was not even sure existed. I lashed out at God anyway. I cursed him and told him he should have taken me. I told God that Crystle’s passing only proved what I had suspected: He was not real. “God is a fairytale,” I thought to myself, as if trying to goad Him into showing himself to me. My anger spilled over to others. I became angry with her physicians and the decisions they made for her medications and for her care. I lashed out at the insurance company as I began the process of making a claim. I was angry that I even had to endure this process. My anger would build until my emotions poured out in tears of hopelessness. The first time I called the insurance company I had to hang up because I was sobbing so hard, I could not make any intelligent sounds come from my being.

Then there was jealousy. I remember watching a couple walking hand in hand through the outlet mall, a place I would only ever be with Crystle. I wanted to walk up to them and shout, “Hey, my wife was taken from me. Do you know that?” I wanted everyone to feel sorry for me. Especially the happy couple! I wanted everyone to know my pain. If I could not have my wife to hold my hand, then everyone should share in my sadness.

I felt guilty. Why had I not had these intense feelings of grief when my father passed away? Did I not love him enough? Why had I not realized how my mother was hurting? Surely, she had faced the same pain when the live of her life left us. And to compound all my emotions, I felt guilty about my jealousy and anger.

This cocktail of emotions was bottled up inside of me. No wonder the sighs erupted from my soul so frequently during this time. I thought no one knew how I was feeling in those early days of grief. And I think it’s probably fair to say that there were some who do not know how I was feeling. But many understood. Many have walked in grief.

About the Author:I grew up in Canada’s east coast and moved to Toronto in my late teens. I was ready to sow my wild oats in the big city. But I met Crystle on a blind date and everything changed. I knew she was the love of my life. I have a business degree from the University of New Brunswick and I have worked in the information technology sector much of my working career. That hardly is credentials for an author, but life makes us all experts, even in areas we may prefer not to hold that title. When Crystle passed my life was forever changed. My grief was so overwhelming I felt I needed to share my story and if even one person is inspired to defeat grief then my writing career will be a success.

Website | Goodreads

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