It’s gift giving season. So, I decided to give one to someone really special. Me! I know that sounds selfish and, maybe, a little conceited. Wait before you scroll away. My perfectly good cell died even after I changed the battery a couple of times. It just wouldn’t hold a charge. I had no choice but to get another.
Have you heard the one about the senior and the smartphone? I don’t mean a senior in high school or college. Get my drift? Well, here’s my version.
Choosing a phone wasn’t the easiest thing I’ve ever done. It wasn’t the quickest, either. I agonized quite a bit about the best one to meet my needs. I just wanted to be able to make and receive calls. But, I wanted to look stylish while doing it. 🙂
I took a secret poll of the types of cell phones used by my cool, young relatives. I did what I do before any purchase that locks me into a contract. (Yea, I signed a contract.) I combed the Internet comparing operating systems and features. I considered reviews—pros and cons. I practically collapsed from research overload until a commercial came on TV advertising just what I had in mind. And—off to the mall I ran! Straight to my provider. To get my first smartphone!
What happened when this senior raced into the store?
The answer after this brief taste of a sweet and spicy romance novel.
Louisiana Hot SauceContemporary—IR/MC—PG13—101,210 words—$5.99
It’s gift giving season. And—does Mesha have a doosy for Jack.
Reclusive Mesha Rayburn’s safe haven disintegrated when athletic Jack Connolly raced into her life. He was like an uninvited guest to her pity party. Yet, his brashness stoked her dormant emotions and injected spunk into her veins with every bated word. And—calling the cinnamon-skinned Black woman “biggety” didn’t help matters.
Mechanic Jack Connolly thought the trip down South to patch up and retrieve the bullet-ridden helicopter would be a pain. He never imagined the rhetoric becoming reality. But, thanks to Mesha’s panicked outcry, it had. The pain radiating in his palm bothered him less than the one in his rear. Bold and beautiful, he had to know why she hid out in the boonies. As her transient tenant, he intended to find out at the risk of feeling the sting of her Louisiana Hot Sauce temper.
Now, back to “The Senior and the Smartphone.”
What happened when this senior raced into the store?
I’m sure you’ve already guessed that phone was out of stock. (No surprise, right?)
Well, that didn’t deter me. The screen on the advertised smartphone wasn’t big enough, anyway. I was in the mood to give—and receive—a gift and by golly, I was going to get one. I browsed up on a phone that seemed just right. The 4.3” screen allowed me to read the clock without my lenses. And—OMG—all the icons in such beautiful colors! The choice was made. The transaction handled. (They made me buy a data plan. Didn’t I tell you I only wanted to look stylish “making calls”? I couldn’t get the phone without the plan) Oh, well.
Then, I believe I irritated the young sales lady with a simple question.
More about that in a second.
First, check out this sweet, spicy romance—only a heartbeat away!
Nicked HeartsContemporary—IR/MC—PG13—34,560 words—$3.99
K.C. can run but heartache follows.
And—so does Dr. Nick Hart, her father’s hired hand.
Blurb: Valentine’s Day surgery trussed up like a Thanksgiving turkey? OVER HER DEAD BODY!
Rambunctious runaway K.C. Montreaux—thirtyish and coddled—crashes the men’s room at Bush Intercontinental and straight into Nick Hart. His clear eyes x-ray through her while she hovers with a facetious grin on a lovely caramel face. A ruckus launches her to an empty stall and forces him into defense mode. Drafted actions cloak Nick’s deceit—from the mainland to Maui—as he helps outwit her pursuer.
Will K.C. snuff out their combustible emotions like hushed Haleakala or forgive Nick’s misguided lies?
Dare his nicked heart dream?
Welcome back to “The Senior and the Smartphone.”
Now, what question turned the sales rep’s smile into a grimace?
Senior: “How do you turn the Internet off?”
She froze. I mean, she literally stopped moving.
Rep: “Here’s the off button.”
Senior: No, no. I understand about the off button. I want the Internet turned off.”
There was complete silence that magnified the frustrated sigh the rep released. She finally came out of her stupor.
Rep: “Just close your browser.”
Senior: “That doesn’t turn the Internet off.”
I could see things like, “Old people” and “Why do you need a phone like that if you want the Internet off?” just twirling around in her head. 😉
I never got an answer.
But, that was no biggie because I had a nephew who worked for a competing company. Surely, he would know how to turn the Internet off. Right? Right and wrong. That fellow broke my smartphone down like a professional marksman does his weapon, with one exception. He left it lying on the table, out of the case and minus the back cover.
Now in his defense, I was quizzing him about the different apps and how activating them tied into all of my personal information on the phone. I guess the last straw was that question. The one that stupefied the sales rep also drove him to the edge.
“How do you turn the Internet off?”
Here’s a question for you. How about a sweet read?
Keep reading to find out how to get yours.
Paranormal—AA—PG—3,226 words—Free Read
Romance can happen on Halloween where tricks turn into treats!
Blurb: Hardnosed construction worker, Frank Hickman, has got to be hallucinating. Is the shimmering beauty beside him a figment of his imagination? Or some warped Halloween prank pulled on him by his boys? Will Frank’s realization come too late?
Now, for the conclusion of “The Senior and the Smartphone.”
I still snicker whenever I recall my buying experience and the lessons learned. I’m a few years beyond the AARP joining age and don’t consider myself over the hill. But, boy, do the youngsters seem to condescend when a seasoned person knows what he or she wants, whether it makes sense to them or not.
I finally stumbled upon how to turn the data network off, right after one Sunday service—while standing on the church steps. (Now, take that sales rep.)
My smartphone is smart when I want it to be. (That may not be completely true from the recent news piece.) I have no trouble reading the screen. The camera takes nice pictures. The color is amazing. And 4G—and making and receiving calls—are only as good as the network.
It makes me happy when I view that beautiful keypad. My Pooh-Pooh wallpaper is simply gorgeous. It was thirty-nine degrees this morning. I know because I turned on the data network and selected the weather app.
All-in-all, I made a wise choice. I just love my gift to me. 🙂
Here’s your chance for a download of either Louisiana Hot Sauce or Nicked Hearts. Simply leave a comment on the day of this post’s release and you’re entered in the drawing. One winner will be announced in the comments.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
Mickie Sherwood ~~Sweet, spicy romance—a heartbeat away~~ Louisiana Lady
About the Author: Mickie Sherwood is an author and novice photographer who takes nature pictures right in her own backyard. She loves to engage in her favorite pastime which also incites her creativity. Combine that aspect of her life with the enjoyment of spending time with her family, and cruising vacations, and the development of interesting characters who encounter intriguing circumstances is not very far behind.