To Spanx or not to Spanx…
Today I had the opportunity to be a guest on a local television talk show and talk about my book. OK, maybe that is a slight exaggeration. I was really there to talk about my dog. I have a confusing art imitates life vice/versa thing going on with my latest book and my new puppy. Bliss is my 7-month old Cavalier King Charles Spaniel. Bliss is also the name of the Cavalier puppy in my newest book, Cup of Joe. To make matters even more unclear, there is a Cavalier on the book cover that bears more than a passing resemblance to the real-life Bliss. Everyone thinks it’s my dog, but it isn’t. The real Bliss is cuter. (Really, she is!)
Anyway, we were invited to be on the show as part of a segment about celebrities and their pets. I was supposed to discuss celebrities who own Cavalier King Charles Spaniels. There are quite a few – Courtney Cox (my fav), Liv Tyler, Lindsay Price, Teri Hatcher, Julianne Hough (from Dancing with the Stars) and of course Charlotte onSex & the City had that wonderful Cavalier named Elizabeth Taylor. The host also talked about my book and it was on-screen for a good 2 minutes. Yay!
Let me just say that I’m not accustomed to being on television. Let me also say that the other two people who were participating in this segment are both about a size 2.
I am not a size 2.
I’m not gigantic or anything, but come on – who looks skinny when they’re standing between two stick figures? Last week, when I thought about the TV segment, I drew comfort from the fact that people watching would be looking at the dogs. I mean, if I were in the audience, I would be looking at the dogs. Late Sunday afternoon, though, my confidence in this theory began to waver and I was reminded of a conversation I had with my husband a while back.
I think I’d been reading People magazine or perhaps something more along the lines of US Weekly or In Touch (hey, don’t judge me!). The magazine quoted a star singing the praises of her Spanx undergarments. You’ve heard of Spanx, I’m sure. They’re these really tight things all the celebrities apparently wear underneath their clothes to look even skinnier than they already are. So, I’m reading the article and I say something about it to my husband. Here’s what happened next:
Husband: “Why don’t you get some of those?”
Me: “Excuse me?”
Husband (starting to look a bit nervous): “Well, I mean, if all the stars wear them…”
Me: “They’re on TV. I’m not on TV. I don’t want to walk around in some tight contraption that makes me uncomfortable.”
Husband (his head is now breaking out into a sweat): “I’m just saying…”
Me (huffing indignantly): “What?”
Me (possibly raising my voice by now): “If I’m ever on TV, I might consider it. But until then, I would really love it if you refrain from telling me I should wear Spanx.”
So, what did I do on Sunday evening? Yes, I went out and bought some blasted Spanx.
They weren’t cheap, but they were worth it. Honestly, I’m not sure if I actually looked any different. I did, however, feel all tightened up and skinny. Maybe the magic of Spanx is in their ability to boost the wearer’s confidence. I’m not sure.
I thought I looked pretty good on TV, even between the reed-thin women on either side of me. But I think the Spanx must have gone to my head because after I got home I ate an entire chocolate bunny. My dog watched me do it, too. It was sad.
Lesson learned: Internet promotions are less stressful. I’m wearing sweatpants right now, the Spanx are tucked away in a drawer and I have not consumed any chocolate critters. (Yet.)
Teri’s son once wrote in a third-grade paper, “My Mom loves dogs and Jesus.” He may have gotten the order reversed, but the sentiment was right on target. Her romance stories are often filled with happy endings, splashes of humor and a loveable critter or two. After all, Cinderella never would have lived happily ever after without a little help from her animal friends!
Teri has been honored with numerous awards for her writing, including the Grand Prize in the 2009 San Antonio Romance Authors Merritt Contest, the 2008 Pet Sitters International Humor Writing Award and the 2006 Westminster Kennel Club Angel on a Leash Writing Award.
To learn more about Teri and her writing, visit www.teriwilson.net. She loves hearing from readers!