LASR Anniversay: Heather Rainier – Guest Blog and Giveaway

anniversary regular banner copy

Enter the Rafflecopter below for your chance to win a $100 Amazon/BN GC and more!

Leave a comment on THIS POST for a chance to win an additional prize – $5.00 in Strandbucks

Skunks and Skanks

Skunks and skanks. There isn’t much difference in these nuisance critters. They both show up where they aren’t wanted and generally stir up a stink before someone runs them off. In Heather Rainier’s latest edition to the Divine Creek Ranch series, Brokenhearted Beauty, Leah Woodworth has the misfortune to have a run-in with both of these irritating varmints in the small town of Tuspita, TX. The situation is exacerbated when the local stuffed shirt, Deputy Dicky Bob, tries to assert his authority. It becomes painfully clear, pretty quick, that he has more than a passing acquaintance with the local hoochie-mama, Georgina, who has recklessly plowed into Leah’s car. The fun really begins when a skunk with perfect timing strolls into the picture. Here’s an excerpt:

Wondering what Georgina was getting so worked up about, Leah said, “Do you know each other, Deputy? Is she implying you have some sort of ‘deal’?”

Georgina bared her teeth and pointed her finger. “You don’t tell her nothin’, Dicky Bob!”

Deputy Dicky Bob responded to the situation by hauling off and kicking the tree stump in the vacant lot that neighbored the gas station property. “That’s it, I’m taking both of you damn bitches down to the jail. We’ll sort all this out down there.”

He grabbed for Leah and she pulled away. “If you’re not arresting me, I’m not going anywhere with you or this skank.”

“What the fuck did you just call me?” Georgina screeched as she ran at Leah, claws bared.

The atmosphere was suddenly split by a high-pitched scream and the most horrendous odor Leah had ever experienced up close. Her eyes watered and felt like they were on fire and her stomach rebelled violently as she spun around, searching for the cause.

Deputy Dicky Bob was holding his hands to his face, screaming, like a girl. “It sprayed me!”

The source of the odor became apparent as the skunk raced right between Georgina’s legs and across the parking lot in terror. Georgina shrieked like a fire alarm, “No, it sprayed me!”

“No, it sprayed me!” he hollered and then made a gagging sound.

Not hanging around for a debate about exactly who got sprayed, Leah ran with the rest of the crowd, dodging the poor, frightened skunk. Anyone within ten yards of that critter could consider themselves sprayed.

Her stomach rolled as she stumbled to her car to grab her box of tissues to mop her eyes, but she was suddenly grabbed from behind.

“Oh, no you don’t!” Dicky Bob hollered. His face was red, his eyes were watering and his nose was running. “You’re under arrest for…for…evading arrest, and a bunch of other stuff.”

I have died and gone to Hell.

“I wasn’t evading arrest, you idiot! I was evading a skunk!”

“We’ll just see about that,” he said as he roughly pushed her against her car. Georgina screamed again and then vomited all over her mustard yellow tank top.

“I think that means you won’t be getting your blow job from Georgina after all, Dicky Bob.” Leah turned after he finished putting handcuffs on her and she smiled at him.

The nausea finally won and she lost her lunch on his shirtfront.

Leave a message for Heather telling her of your experience with one of nature’s most-maligned varmints and she’ll award $5.00 in Strandbucks to one lucky poster.

HEATHER RAINIER me-hr-dcr-brokenheartedbeauty-full (2)Brokenhearted and grieving, Leah Woodworth’s heart is filled with regret for never confessing her love to Patterson Elder. His loss haunts her dreams and she can’t set eyes on his brothers, James and Vincent without seeing his face. Having denied her attraction to them until it was too late, how can they possibly still want her?

James and Vincent were sure Leah was the one from the moment they met her. Patterson had always shared that belief, taking every chance to convince her that she was meant to be theirs. With Patterson gone, James and Vincent are deep in their own mourning and at a loss as to why Leah avoids them.

When she is offered an opportunity that may take her permanently out of Divine, they realize time has run out and seize what may be the last chance they have to make her theirs forever.

About the Author:Heather Rainier lives and writes in South Central Texas. Her stories offer up the content of her fantasies, with autobiographical humor, triumph and tragedy mixed in.

Heather’s love of romance fiction began as a teenager when her mom gave her copies of Kathleen Woodiwiss’s “”The Flame and the Flower”” and Bertrice Small’s “”Skye O’Malley””. To this day she’s pretty sure that was her mom’s version of the “”birds and the bees”” talk.

Heather writes the type of novel she loves to read: More erotic and edgy than the mainstream, with plenty of sweet romance mixed in and a happily ever after guaranteed. Heather’s favorite type of hero is the gentle, lovable giant but readers will discover a wide variety of heroes and alphas on the pages of her novels, from nearly perfect to very flawed.

When not happily typing at her keyboard, Heather is usually busy corralling her kids, or loving on her smokin’ hot husband, who thankfully loves to cook.

Website ~ Facebook ~

Buy the book at Bookstrand.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Comments

  1. Cindy Mucha Barton says:

    We have had our fair share of wildlife in our backyard for years. The only one brave enough to come to our back door was a skunk. I think if we had dogs our backyard would have stunk to high heaven. Luckily, we only have indoor cats. While I think skunks are adorable, that is one animal I will stay out of the way of.

  2. Virginia H says:

    This sounds like an interesting read although I don’t read much erotica. The book blurb sounds really good.

  3. Although I live in a big urban area, skunks and possums live in the yards, bushes, trees etc. I’ve been lucky not to encounter a skunk, but I have smelled it’s defensive odor on different nights and have needed to close down the windows to keep it out.

  4. Skunks are the worst. I can’t tell you how many times the dogs have come home smelling like… ugh… there are no words to describe it. I grew up in a pier and beam house and I guess the worst was when the dog would some how get under the house — usually under my bedroom — to let the smell wear off. Those were the days I would usually go stay with my couins LOL

  5. SHELLEY S says:

    WE HAD A SKUNK TO COME AROUND OUR HOUSE AND LUCKY FOR US THE CATS WERE IN THE HOUSE. THANKS FOR THE GIVEAWAY! calicolady60@hotmail.com

  6. Tracey Reid says:

    I loved Broken Hearted Beauty! The skunk scene was hilarious! Thank you!

  7. Cathy McCarron says:

    I lovvvvvved Brokenhearted Beauty!! It was sad but also happy too!! Heather Rainier has done it again!! When you meet Leah She is devastated but quickly learns that love comes to you no matter how hard you try to fight it! Vincent and James are just what Leah needs to mend her broken heart!! I lovvvved it!!! Thank you Heather for another great book in this wonderful SERIES!!!

  8. Lisa Carter says:

    I absolutely loved Brokenhearted Beauty. I’ve never had an upclose and personal meeting, but being a country kid, I’ve smelled them from a distance… If you’re far enough away, the smell isn’t too bad!

  9. Kelley H. says:

    I love Heather Rainier’s Books.

  10. Kelley H. says:

    I don’t like skunks either

  11. I see skunks on the road, but I don’t think I’ve dealt with one in person. There might have been one in our yard when I was little once…

  12. Stacy Wilson says:

    When I was about 13, my mom came home with the MOST adorable little critter. Si small, so soft….so stinky! Yes, a baby skunk. We took him to our vet who was also an exotic animal vet. He de-scented the itty bitty and we brought him home. Squeaky grew up thinking he was a cat. He didn’t purr but squeaked. Hence his name. He LOVE to root around the base of the pines around the house and he always came back to me.

    Stacy Wilson
    dragn_lady at yahoo.com

  13. Ginger Robertson says:

    Hi Heather.

    I’ve never had a run in with a skunk and hope I never do.

    My issue would be with frogs or others such critters. I have no wish to deal with any of them. No thank you.

    I loved the name of the sheriff Dicky Bob…that is so lol. Thank you for the excerpt and synopsis.

    Ginger

  14. Wanda Miller says:

    My two boys had a little trouble with not one ,but 2 skunks when they were growing up. They loved to run around in the woods next to our house at night. They had a group of friends and loved to play games in the dark. They both thought they were cats till they got a little too close. As soon as they hit the door, I ran them back outside. Lots of tomato juice was used!!

  15. Heather is the best. The entire Divine series is great. I have cried and laughed with all of the characters. Just so you know not all the skunks in Divine have 4 legs, but that is what you have duct tape.

  16. Becky Blencoe says:

    I just love this series with all my heart! I’ve only had one experience with a skunk and it was on a camping trip with friends near a lake. I was bathing in the lake and as soon as I got out I was immediately sprayed by a skunk. Apparently he did not like the scent of my wash and figured I would smell better with scent of funk! Needless to say I got my own tent that night since no one wanted to share with me and a nice tomato soup bath the next day!!

  17. None to share

    bn100candg at hotmail dot com

  18. Mary Nguyen says:

    Possums! *Shivers* They are creepy little creatures!

  19. While living with my Mom in a retirement community I took a walk one evening with a friend. There is a lovely creek that makes for a great walk. Well, it was getting to be dusk and we saw a skunk up ahead…so we waiting until he went his merry way and proceeded down the path. When we later turned around to go home, there he was again! This was the only way out, other than hiking through the condos. We ended up doing just that and came upon ANOTHER skunk at the road! Luckily we avoided contact with all these guys. My friend later told me she passed another skunk (maybe the same one!) in the middle of the road on the way out! It was a skunk boom that year! 🙂

  20. Well that last couple years have been chasing raccoons out of the yard, they come to the birdfeeders and pick around under them, have to chase them out before the dog is let out, previously had to contend with skunks, but not for a few years, the old dog we had always ended up getting skunked.
    skpetal at hotmail dot com

  21. Sara McDaniel says:

    I’ve never dealt with a skunk up close but just the smell when I’ve gone near where on is……ugh!! The skunk scene made me laugh so hard, tears coming from my eyes (as if I wasn’t already crying enough already)!! Loved this book, love the whole series and Heather is just so wonderful to chat with about her books or life in general!!

  22. Robin Lynn says:

    Have had skunks, possum and raccoons come into my backyard. The skunks have to be the most brave. They come right up on the deck to the back door. And nothing scares them off. We stay inside just to keep from getting sprayed.

  23. So far I have managed to avoid skunks except for when they are on the road and have not managed to avoid them.

Speak Your Mind

*